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2001-07-04<>1:56 p.m.

i am 17.

i have been thinking lately. i cant seem to make friends with people my own age. jennie and cindy are the only two friends i have who are my own age. by age, i mean grade. let me give you an example.

simon, alaina, garrett - they are all 20 years old. and as for now, they are pretty much some of the best friends in the area.

rebekah - is 25 years old. or 26. i dont know, she always gets mad at me for getting her age wrong. she is my best online friend.

lisa - is 21.

megyn - is 15

cynthia - is 15. oh wait... shit, i dont know how old cynthia is!

jeanette - is 20 or something. maybe 21? no, i think she is 20.

erica - is also 20 or something.

mark - he is rather close to my age. he is 17. but i am going to be a freshman in college, and he will be a senior.

yennie - is 22 or 23 by now.

esther - is 26? maybe? i dont know, something like that.

michael - who i went to winter formal with, is 19.

mike - is 23, i read his diary. he is nice to talk to and he had a broken leg in highschool.

i just made a new friend today. salty ron. one of the cute boys that lived in the ex-j spot. a house in tallahassee. i dont know his age, but he is a senior in college. so thats older.

jennie is 17, my best friend in real life, the only good friend in real life that is my age.

cindy is 18, but on the same educational track as i.

and also, morgan is my age. but morgan and i never really hang out. we should, though.

so if you cant tell, most of my friends are older. i dont really know what to make of this. i dont really think of myself as younger when i am with them. but also, i dont really consider myself mature or anything. if anything, i think of myself as immature for my age. i dont know whats up, and i dont know why i cant meet friends of my age anywhere.

maybe i should just shut up and go with the flow.