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i cant handle this.

2002-02-05<>12:09 p.m.

mrs. stuart wasnt at school. i called her house, and nobody answered. its too bad, because i doubt i will get the courage to go talk to her again.

despite her absence... there was a handful of people that i knew that i saw. stephanie, another graduation speaker from last year, said hi to me, we talked a short bit. then i saw my friend brandon from red bluff, we talked, exchanged phone numbers. he told me that he and stevens mom had like a 45 minute talk the other day. apparently, she mentioned me. something about how i had a crush on steven first. blah blah blah. hurray for me! even adults know gossip about me. that didnt make me feel too great.

i saw simon, too. he was walking with julia. it turns out that i know julia, she used to work with sam. now, i am not sure, but i think simon is moving into an apartment with julia. if this is correct... someone should shoot simon. he is a dumb, dumb boy.

i am considering dropping out of school and leaving with no trace.