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boys should like me

2001-04-08<>2:19 p.m.

apparently, in shasta county, every highschool student must write an essay and have the teachers grade it on a 6 point scale, 6 being the best. two teachers read it and grade it. there were only twelve 12s in the whole county (thats like 5000 kids) and i got one! woo! so yeah, my essay is cool and now i shall post it in here

now that i am seventeen year old and in highschool, i have made an important decision: i like boys. for the past twelve years, i have watched all my friends go out and break up with many boys, meanwhile, i just stayed at home, watched television and did my homework. i have, however, had one "boyfriend." his name was jesse and it was in sixth grade. the relationship was the kind where i said "will you go out with me?" and then we never got within five feet of eachother. needless to say, he called me in the middle of the summer to break up with me. we never actually went out. here i am, six years later, making another important decision: boys should like me.

i have thought long and hard about this, and i hm still quite unsure of why i hav enever had a boyfriend. hell, no boy has ever even showed any interest in me. in fact, the way that i am, boys should b elining up just to hang out with me. let me explain some very important reasons as to why boys should like me.

i am nice. i am so insanely nice, i have driven over eight hours just to hang out with a friend who was in need of a shoulder to cry on. i smile to almost everyone i see, regardless of whether i know him or her. i am almost always in a happy disposition and i rarely get angry. (sorry, that last seentance is a complete lie.) but unless someone hurts me, i am generally nice.

despite my extremly wonderful personality, i do not think i am too horrible looking. i see boys all the time with girls much prettier than i. but then again, i also see boys with girls who arent exactally super-models. why dont buys find me attractice? i am somewhat tall, i have no major disfigurations, and my face is clear of acne. my eyes are beautiful, big and brown, and ive got luscious lips (all the better to kiss you with, my dear.) i have a few female friends who say that i am very pretty. i honestly do not agree with them, but i do think that my looks are definately acceptable.

if boys do not like me because of my charming personality, they should like me because of my insanely hip taste in clothes and music. i am not "into" rap or hip-hop like most girls. i like to listen to punk rock and ska. occasionally, ill even slip back to the classics like james taylor and otis redding. my clothes are like no other. Not only am i a super-shopper, (meaning that my entire wardrobe for the 2000-2001 schools year cost a mere $17.61), i am quite fashionable. never will anyone find an outfit that can even come close to being comparable with mine. i have the kind of style that mixes and matches solits with plaids, checkers and polka-dots. what boy can resist that?

here i am, boys, i am charming, i am pretty, and i dress nicely, so why dont you want to go out with me? perhaps none of these reasons are good enough for the boys, which is why i must give one more reason as to why boys should like me: i am desperate. i am so desperate, i can guarantee that any boy who shows the slightest bit of interest in my (as long as he is not an ugly jerk who likes rap and who dresses badly), will be chosen as my boyfriend before too long.

perhaps i am missing a very important reason as to why boys do not have a romantic interest in me (i dont smell, do i?), but if i were to read this essay and i were a boy, i would definately go out with me in a heartbeat. i am way too wonderful to just let slip bby. readers, i have a proposal for you: if you know any boys who are single, nice and have similar music interests as i, please inform my teacher so that she can let me know and perhaps nobody will ever have to read an essay like this again. thank you.

please, that request goes to you, too. except, dont let my teacher know, just email me.