when you leave:
wish list

before all after

my tummy sticks out (no, im not pregnant. im full)


its thanksgiving. i hate the holidays.

this, i found really disturbing: we were at my aunts house (my mothers sister). this is mean, but my moms side of the family is sort of white-trash-ish. my cousin, crystal, ALWAYS has a new boyfriend. ALWAYS. she is 16 years old, my other cousin, johnny, is like 10 or something, i dont know, i lost track. he is annoying. anyway, johnny and crystal were telling us funny stories or something. this one particular story came up. apparently, johnny wanted to get his ear pierced, but then crystal said "only fags get their ears pierced." and then she thought, and said "oh wait, my boyfriend has his ear pierced." yeah... okay, it sounds stupid, but that comment really bothered me. "only fags get their ears pierced."

i dont like that word... "fag." michael called himself a fag once. it was sad.

i called his pager today. i guess i have some hope that he still has it or something (or i am paging a complete stranger). he has not called back. oh well, that is expected. i still miss him.

happy holidays.